In our previous post we explained what a parent coordinator is.

But it's also important to point out that Parent Coordinators cannot solve all of your problems, especially if you're not willing to work with them.

Parent Coordinators are NOT Therapists. They are not hired to help you deal with your personal issues, but rather for the specific purpose of helping you learn to co-parent effectively.

Parent Coordinators are NOT Couples Therapists. They are also not hired to help you "fix" or understand your relationship with your ex. Their job is to help you help your children by learning to communicate better.

Parent Coordinators are NOT Mediators. While some of what they do is similar to mediation, you're not trying to reach an agreement on a specific issue. One specific issue may result in your calling the coordinator, but long term the process is not about mediating one issue, but learning how to resolve all parenting issues more civilly.

Parent Coordinators are NOT Judges. Sometimes a parent coordinator will make a decision similar to a Judge if the parties have agreed to give them that authority. However, any decision is only binding until reviewed by the Court. And the use of this power is unusual because it defeats the goal of having the parents begin to work these issues out together rather than always seeking outside help.

Parent Coordinators are NOT Guardian Ad Litems. A Guardian At Litem reports to the Court on issues such as custody, after an investigation. It is not the job of a Parent Coordinator to report to the Court or to take sides.

According to the Guidelines for Parenting Coordination developed by the AFCC Task Force on Parenting Coordination:

"Parenting coordination is a child-focused alternative dispute resolution process in which a mental health or legal professional with mediation training and experience assists high conflict parents to implement their parenting plan by facilitating the resolution of their disputes in a timely manner, educating parents about children's needs, and with prior approval of the parties and/or the court, making decisions within the scope of the court order or appointment contract."

In other words, a Parent Coordinator helps parents avoid court by mediating their co-parenting disagreements.

Although some states have statutes that define Parent Coordinator's powers, in Massachusetts there is no statutory authority for parenting coordination. Judges differ on whether they have authority to order Parent Coordinators without a statute granting them that authority. Arguably the discretion afforded Judges to create orders for the best interest of the children could be extended to order the parents to cooperate with a parent coordinator. In all cases, though, Judges can affirm an agreement of the parties to use a parent coordinator.

This type of agreement is often recommended by attorneys in high conflict cases as a potential solution to avoiding multiple court hearings. In many instances a parent coordinator can be cheaper than going back to court again and again, and more effective because they not only assist with the immediate problem but help parents learn how to communicate with each other. If successful, the parents will no longer need the assistance of the court or eventually even the parent coordinator to help them co-parent effectively.