M.G.L. 208 s 34 provides a list of factors for the court to consider in dividing marital property and/or assigning alimony awards. One of these factors is "the conduct of the parties during the marriage." Quite often this is the factor that clients want to talk about the most, but is the least important factor to the court. Although adultery and other offensive behavior may have led to the divorce, the Judges are used to seeing this behavior in so many cases that they become jaded to it and prefer to focus on the financial factors most of the time.

This means that bad conduct which affects the finances (such as spending money on an extra-marital affair or gambling) will be taken into account, but often bad conduct which does not affect the finances will not. However, this does not mean that non-financial bad conduct has no effect at all, and sometimes if it is egregious enough the court may consider its effect on the marriage itself.

Especially if the conduct is significant as in the case of Wolcott v. Wolcott. In that case, the court awarded the Husband approximately 90% of the martial estate, primarily due to the Wife's extremely bad conduct. Because of attempts that the Wife made to find someone in the "mafia" to make her husband "disappear", a jury convicted the wife of solicitation to commit murder, and she served three months in the house of correction before being released on parole.

Although this is obviously an extreme example, the Court indicated that consideration of much less egregious conduct under § 34 has been approved. The Court further indicated that conduct could be considered which harmed the martial estate OR the marriage itself.

A recent tongue-in-cheek blog post by fellow attorney and blawger, Gabriel Cheong, describes his support for the 2010 California Marriage Protection Act.

The 2010 California Marriage Protection Act, a proposed amendment available at http://rescuemarriage.org/2009/08/22/2010-california-protection-of-marriage-act/, takes Proposition 8 one step further by banning divorce in the state of California.

Support of the 2010 California Marriage Protection Act demonstrates the hypocrisy of attacking gay marriage for being detrimental to the sanctity of marriage when the state allows divorce. Divorce, after all, is the ultimate attack on the sanctity of marriage.

Although this is the classic slippery slope argument, the method can hardly be questioned by those who claim gay marriage will lead to people wanting to marry their pets.

This leads to the question: What does it really mean to protect the sanctity of marriage?

Sanctity is defined by the Merriam Webster Dictionary as 1. the holiness of life and character, or 2. the quality or state of being holy or sacred.

So when you hear pundits, politicians and protesters telling you that the sanctity of marriage is being attacked in the United States, they are right. But it isn't under attack because homosexual couples want to get married. The sanctity of marriage has been under attack since the first time one spouse cheated on their spouse, lied to their spouse, or otherwise disrespected the bonds of marriage.

The fight to keep marriage sacred is not a fight that can be won by the writing of laws, or restricting certain people from enjoying that bond. The fight to keep marriage sacred is an ever vigilant effort by a spouse to support, love and respect their spouse, and it takes two spouses willing to make that effort.

Forcing people to stay in marriages where their spouse is unwilling to make that effort is just as silly as refusing to recognize that homosexuals also have the ability to participate in a sacred bond of support, love and respect with their partners (whether or not the laws support them).

In Massachusetts there are statutory waiting periods that control when the divorce becomes final (also called Absolute). Until the divorce is officially final you cannot remarry anywhere without committing bigamy (i.e. being married to two people).

In Massachusetts the length of this waiting period depends on the type of divorce case.

In a Joint Petition for Divorce under Section 1A of M.G.L. c. 208, if both parties agree that there has been an irretrievable breakdown of the marriage and agree on all other issues related to their marriage, as described in a Separation Agreement, then you can file a Joint Petition for Divorce. The Court will set a date and time for an uncontested divorce hearing, once you have filed a Joint Petition for Divorce, a certified copy of the Marriage Certificate, an Affidavit of Irretrievable Breakdown, a Certificate of Absolute Divorce or Annulment, a Separation Agreement, two Rule 401 Financial Statements, and two Certificates of Attendance at the Parents Apart Program (if there are minor children of the marriage).

In most cases, both you and your spouse must attend the uncontested divorce hearing and testify under oath that your marriage has suffered an irretrievable breakdown. The Judge will then issue Findings of Fact and if the Judge finds that your marriage is irretrievably broken down, then a Judgment of Divorce Nisi will issue after thirty (30) days, and it will become Absolute after a further ninety (90) days.

This means that if you file a Joint Petition for Divorce you are not legally and officially divorced until 120 days after the divorce hearing date.

Under Section 1 or 1B of M.G.L. c. 208, if only one person in the marriage is ready to tell the Court that the marriage is over, or if you cannot agree with your spouse on other issues related to the divorce (such as the division of property, custody of children, amount of support, etc.), then you must file a Complaint for Divorce. If the parties are unable to settle their divorce case, then a trial will be held, and after reviewing both parties' proposals and the evidence, the Court will issue a Judgment of Divorce Nisi and it will become Absolute after a further ninety (90) days. Similarly after 6 months have passed since the date of service, a Complaint for Divorce may be settled and a Separation Agreement presented to the Court. If the Court approves the Separation Agreement then the Court will issue a Judgment of Divorce Nisi and it will become Absolute after a further ninety (90) days.

This means that if you file a Complaint for Divorce, whether or not there is a trial or a settlement, you are not legally and officially divorced until 90 days after the issuance of the Judgment of Divorce Nisi.

In addition, once the divorce is final there is typically a three-day waiting period for obtaining a marriage license after the application is submitted to your town or city hall. However, it is possible to apply to the Probate Court for a waiver of this three-day period for good cause.